Your Thrones Summary of The Week

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By Jacob Lieberman and Nworah Ayogu

What’s The Deal? 

Welcome to Quibbl’s weekly rundown on America’s favorite reality show, Game of Thrones! For the next seven weeks we’re going to be doing weekly recaps and regional reviews. Oh, and of course we’ll be Quibbling away the whole time, throwing out the biggest questions and looking for the best predictions. So, before one of us gets goes down an Ed Sheeran rabbit hole, let’s get to it! Needless to say…SPOILERS AHEAD!

This Week on Thrones

From the look of things, it seems like this season will include some serious Stark retribution (broken up, surely, by some serious Stark stupidity, but we’ll get there). In the very first scene we get to witness Arya going full secret agent man all over the Freys. Valar Morghulis, Walder! Her masquerade as Lord Walder Frey–who we know is dead– is almost perfectly Scooby-doo, and it results in his entire family dropping dead after toasting to their depravity with poisoned wine and a speech that would have made Lyanna Mormont proud.

Arya then hangs out with Ed Sheeran and a bunch of Lannister soldiers, who actually seem pretty normal. Ed sings a little song (if you listen closely you’ll hear the story of Tyrion and Shae) and they talk about their families. Arya thinks about killing them, but seems charmed by their ordinariness and decides to let them live another day. But not before telling them she’s off to King’s Landing to kill the Queen!

While everyone is having a good laugh in the Riverlands, in the North, the Night King and his army of White Walkers are on the move — bringing what seems to be like a bad-ass winter storm with them. Also, now there are giant White Walkers, because you weren’t already scared. This is pretty bad news for the Night’s Watch at the Wall, who are now accompanied by Meera Reed and Bran Stark, who has apparently picked up the ability to access his visions without the aid of a Weirwood tree.

Just down the King’s Road in Winterfell, Jon Snow and Sansa Stark are butting heads, and they’re doing it publicly. Poor, Jon. He wants to rule justly, but he still hasn’t fully grasped that he’s living in an unjust world. Sansa, on the other hand, is like the audience: sick and tired of watching Starks act like morons because they think it’s the right thing to do. She wants Jon to give the Karstark and Umber castles to a family loyal to the new King in the North, rather than give them back to the families that betrayed the Starks in the first place. At this point Jon has all the power, so he pulls rank and brings the Karstarks and the Umbers back into the fold. But Sansa is probably right — there can’t be NO punishment for betraying your Lord and getting his youngest son killed. She’s clearly picked up a bit of political savvy from her two mentors, Littlefinger and Cersei (also two of the most sociopathic characters on the show, so let’s see how this turns out for Sansa), and she’s feeling slighted despite her critically important role in winning the Battle of the Bastards. This…could…get…ugly. Whatever happens, we’ll be fine because we have Lyanna Mormont, who can protect the North on her own with her 62 men from Bear Island if the Starks are too busy staring angstily into the distance. Also, Brienne and Tormund watch continues…

Further down the road Kingslanding has been redefined and there is a new order. Cersei has established herself as someone to be feared, respected, and hated. She finds herself atop the iron throne. One of the few chacters in the show who was not striving for the thrones now poses it. And she has discovered it is lonely at the top. She has in a way sacrificed her children, the thing of most value to her in the world for her throne, and she shows that she has no intention of giving it up.

She will create a di-nasty – which we can only assume is two nasties or a one generational dynasty. Jaime seems to be as confused as we are.

Her next step however is in keeping her new found power. As not only does she find herself personally isolated with the loss of her children and what we can only assume will be a growing alienation with Jaime, but she is isolated from the rest of Westeros. She needs allies. And to whom does she turn…the most dynamic new character of the season (but it is early). Euron Greyjoy. Who enters with the bravado of the Zorro and the unpredictability to The Joker. He had some of the most memorable one liners of the episode, commending Jaime for the killing of Greyjoys, offering his ships and both his hands, and expounding on the joys of fratricide. This is clearly someone who means to shake things up, and act as the wedge between the Lannister twins. He exits as flashily as he enters promising to return with something of value for Cersei.

Over in Oldtown, Samwell Tarly is starting to get restless. Rather than learning about the history of the Long Night, the White Walkers, the Children of the Forest and all that fun stuff that could ultimately save the planet, he spends his days stacking books and scrubbing chamber pots. Also he’s tending to the sick, which includes a grey-scaled Jorah Mormont, who has somehow ended up in Oldtown on his quest to cure this incurable disease. Frankly, he’s probably in the right spot given the millenia of knowledge hidden in the depths of the Citadel. Regardless, Sammy’s not getting any respect from his maester friends, so what does he do? He steals the keys to the restricted section of the Citadel library!

And of course, he conveniently stumbles upon a map of Dragonstone, just as he’s about to give up and fall asleep. Dragonstone–for those of you who aren’t complete nerds–is the once and future Targaryen island fortress off the coast of Kings’ Landing. Coincidentally, the island happens to sit atop a whole lotta dragonglass, that annoyingly rare material that just so happens to be one of only two things that can kill a Whitewalker (the other being Valyrian steel). Jon Snow — who earlier in the episode orders his bannermen to scour the North for the stuff — might find this part interesting… 

Meanwhile, guess who just showed up on the incredibly long beaches of Dragonstone? Daenerys Targaryen! She rows in with Tyrion and the gang, and proceeds to kneel on the beach, drawing her fingers through sand of the birthplace she left as an infant. Now that Dany is officially back in Westeros, things should begin to move rather quickly. And I’ll just put this out there — Jon is looking for dragonglass, Dany has a whole bunch of it, will they meet up? And will Jon know that they are cousins by that point? Stay tuned!

Betting

  1. Seeing as Jon needs dragonglass, and Daenerys has it, will Jon ally with Daenarys? After all, Tyrion is still kinda married to Sansa, and getting the Littlefinger–Tyrion–Varys gang together would be fire. Quibbl here
  2. Since they’re in the same place, will Sam find a cure for Jorah’s greyscale? Quibbl here
  3. Also, while we’re at it, Tormund-and- Brienne-Watch continues. Will they or won’t they? Quibbl here
  4. They’re on a collision course, so the question must be asked, will Jaime reconcile with Tyrion? Quibbl here
  5. What about Cersei? We know Arya’s coming for her. Is she doomed in the next two episodes since Arya’s coming for the red keep? Quibbl here

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